Fae/Faer
Fae/faer is a neopronoun borrowed from the word for fairy folk; it declines like she/her and is mostly used online.
- fae
- faer
- faer
- faers
Said: fay / fair / fair / fairz / fair-SELF
The forms
| Subject | faefae is here |
|---|---|
| Object | faerI saw faer |
| Possessive | faerfaer book |
| Possessive (standing alone) | faersthat is faers |
| Reflexive | faerselfby faerself |
In a sentence
What it is
Fae is the old word for the fairy folk, and as a pronoun it does the job of he or she. Faer covers him, her and his; faers is the standalone possessive; faerself is the reflexive. The pattern is she/her with a different sound at the front, so if you can say "her coat is hers", you can say "faer coat is faers".
It is newer than most sets on this site and it comes from the internet, not from a book or a newsletter. People who use it often chose it for how it feels rather than how it functions: a little outside, a little wild, deliberately not a person-shaped word. You do not have to like the reason to get the grammar right.
How to use it
- Fae takes the singular verb: "fae is", "fae has", "fae does". Treat it exactly like she.
- Faer is both the object and the possessive determiner, the way her is: "I met faer" and "faer bike". Faers is only for the standalone possessive: "the bike is faers".
- Say fae like the fae of folklore, rhyming with day. Faer rhymes with hair. If the person says it differently, copy them.
- The word also means fairy, and some people will react to that. Do not explain or defend the person's choice for them. It is a pronoun; say it and move on.
- Slip, fix, continue: "she, sorry, fae, said it was fine." Then stop talking about it.
Getting used to it
- Rewrite a short message about a friend replacing she/her/hers with fae/faer/faers. Say it out loud. The f at the front feels odd for a day and then does not.
- Practise the two jobs of faer in one sentence: "I gave faer faer coat." It sounds repetitive because her would too. That is the pattern working.
- Use it about a character in a book or a game for a week. Low stakes, nobody watching, plenty of sentences.
Who uses this
Fae/Faer comes up on four pages in the library.
That is all this list is. No identity requires a pronoun set, and most imply nothing about pronouns at all.
Agender 1 entry
Xenogender 3 entries
Where it comes from
The origin isn't reliably recorded. Wiktionary dates the pronoun use to about 2013, Pronouns.page credits a Tumblr user in 2014, and Wikipedia's table of third-person pronouns lists the set without a coiner. Take all three as "early 2010s, online" and nothing firmer than that.
Questions people ask
How is fae pronounced?
Fae rhymes with day, like the fairy folk. Faer rhymes with hair; faers adds a z sound; faerself is faer plus self. Ask the person if you are unsure, since the spelling gives a couple of options and they will have one.
Is it disrespectful to use a word that means fairy?
Not if it is the word the person asked for. Pronouns borrowed from nouns are older than this one, and the person chose it knowing what it means. Your job is to use it plainly, not to have an opinion about it out loud.
Other sets
Pronouns are one part of it
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Pronouns are a request about language, not a claim about anyone else. Using someone’s pronouns costs nothing and says a lot.